This is likely to be the last post on this blog.
Why?
Because I'm creating a new blog?
Why?
Because I have my own server now.
And
I'm writing my own software now.
And
You can find it at
http://trydyingtolive.dynalias.com/blog
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
The Choices
You know what sucks about Youth Ministry? No matter what you do someone is left out, or upset, or confused. In order to create a strong 7-12 grade ministry, the others have to suffer. In order to simplify that program, so and so doesn't have a part. Because person A is there person B won't come. If I'm doing thing #1, things #2, #3 and #4 won't get done. When I'm with person C person D is left alone. And when I make a mistake, nothing gets done, no one is happy, and its a wasted day. Persons A, B, C, and D are ignored, things #1, #2, #3, and #4 won't be done. And things that should have been done aren't.
Let me ask you:
Shoot yourself in the left foot?
Shoot yourself in the right foot?
Shoot yourself in both feet?
Let me ask you:
Shoot yourself in the left foot?
Shoot yourself in the right foot?
Shoot yourself in both feet?
Monday, January 07, 2008
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
The Next Day
Ohhh man. Staying up for 20 hours straight isn't like it used to be. Our lock-in went off very well. We had 31 kids. It was pretty awesome.
In other news. The game portal is amazing. Simply awesome. If you even think about getting any game. Get that one. Read any review if you don't believe me. I am in love with that game. I can't wait to get to play some of the bonus levels.
In further news there is no temperature outside. That makes me sad. It didn't even get warm enough for frost to form this evening. That makes me glad.
In other news. The game portal is amazing. Simply awesome. If you even think about getting any game. Get that one. Read any review if you don't believe me. I am in love with that game. I can't wait to get to play some of the bonus levels.
In further news there is no temperature outside. That makes me sad. It didn't even get warm enough for frost to form this evening. That makes me glad.
Friday, December 28, 2007
The Sign
This sign makes me happy. Just like Half-Life2 Ep1 and Ep1 and Portal and Team Fortress2. I'll be talking about them eventually. Not because I want to, but because I just can't help to.
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Sunday, December 23, 2007
The 2008
The sky has spewed so much of the white fluffy stuff I haven't seen grass in weeks less anything green. It was so bad I broke down and bought a shovel and some salt. Winter has beaten me. I have succumbed to shoveling. The worst part is when the white fluffy stuff turns into little cannon balls and turns everything into a winter wonderland on ice. I'm looking forward to the new year. There are so many things I am working on for the youth group. MCI. Small Groups. CIY. Etc. I'm looking forward to having internet at home, Orange Box, the Youth Center being finished, meeting everyone in town, and paying taxes. Ok, maybe not meeting everyone in town. Anyway here is wishing everyone a Merry Christmas a Happy New Year.-Mark
Thursday, November 29, 2007
The Sickness
So, I'm getting sick. Sick of colors on my computer. Sick of round buttons. Sick of people with photoshop and too much time.
So, I never understood why artists would go to a junk yard and take some stuff and glue it together and call it art. And I never understood why people would praise it and adore it and rave about it. Still I never understood why people would display it and pay money for it. I mean, its junk. It looks good- sort of -but its still junk.
I feel that way about computers these days. I just feel like people put too much emphasis on how it looks. Its that mac wow moment: when you open your program and it wiggles from the bottom. "Ohh and ahhh." I just read a review of Leopard (Mac OS 10.5) and the guy basically said its like Mac's version of Vista, but instead of it having less crashes it has more crashes. Its really pretty, but the prettiness hinders rather than helps. Thank you for finally saying that, Mr. PC Mag guy.
I use AVG for my anti-virus. Many people use Avast!. People constantly site as a con of AVG that it doesn't have a very good looking UI. I have to agree. AVG uses big square buttons that are well labled. Avast! on the other hand looks like Winamp. I can't tell when any of the buttons do. How do I update? Is it doing it for me? How do I scan? Someone might say just take a little time to figure it out. I say, I don't want to interpret your hieroglyphics, just to check for viruses. Give me big ugly buttons please!
I was able to attend one of Microsoft's developers conferences when they launched Vista. The MS evangelist showed one example of how .NET3 could be used so well. He had this beautiful program that would flip pages like a book and show data. Rounded buttons and all sorts of gradient colors. It was good stuff, but I know me. If I can run something fast and ugly I would rather do that than have something pretty.
There is much to be said about a good user interface. Something that doesn't abuse the light that is about to reach your eyes, and helps you get your work done fast. Thats all I want. Thats why I turn off all the effects on XP or Vista or whatever I use. Either they don't work right or they just don't add anything. Example: in Windows 95 the Start button was clearly a button. It was of good size easy to click, and it was clear that you should use it. In XP it blends in a little more. Becoming part of the frame that your work goes in. In Vista its just a little circle. It doesn't even read Start anymore. Just a symbol. Looks good, but it isn't clearly a button.
Now, here is a great example how a good UI can make all the difference. Ribbons. In Office 2007 the ribbon interface is brilliant. I find things easier. The pictures that are added helps my brain understand what it does. The common things are bigger, the less common smaller. I do have one problem with it. To open a new file or save or print option you have to click that big round office symbol to get a menu. How am I supposed to know that? I guess I have to read a help file or something. They were able to put everything else in a tab, why return to the drop down menu there?
Whats the point of all this? When MS considered how people work and how to help them do a better job, they cam up with Ribbons. Brilliant, helpful, home run. When they thought about how to make the program look better they came up with fuzzy title bars and tiny buttons I expect my grandma will never figure out, slow my computer, and add nothing.
So developers: help your customer do what they want to do, and then make it pretty.
Oh.. and I think I'm coming down with something.
So, I never understood why artists would go to a junk yard and take some stuff and glue it together and call it art. And I never understood why people would praise it and adore it and rave about it. Still I never understood why people would display it and pay money for it. I mean, its junk. It looks good- sort of -but its still junk.
I feel that way about computers these days. I just feel like people put too much emphasis on how it looks. Its that mac wow moment: when you open your program and it wiggles from the bottom. "Ohh and ahhh." I just read a review of Leopard (Mac OS 10.5) and the guy basically said its like Mac's version of Vista, but instead of it having less crashes it has more crashes. Its really pretty, but the prettiness hinders rather than helps. Thank you for finally saying that, Mr. PC Mag guy.
I use AVG for my anti-virus. Many people use Avast!. People constantly site as a con of AVG that it doesn't have a very good looking UI. I have to agree. AVG uses big square buttons that are well labled. Avast! on the other hand looks like Winamp. I can't tell when any of the buttons do. How do I update? Is it doing it for me? How do I scan? Someone might say just take a little time to figure it out. I say, I don't want to interpret your hieroglyphics, just to check for viruses. Give me big ugly buttons please!
I was able to attend one of Microsoft's developers conferences when they launched Vista. The MS evangelist showed one example of how .NET3 could be used so well. He had this beautiful program that would flip pages like a book and show data. Rounded buttons and all sorts of gradient colors. It was good stuff, but I know me. If I can run something fast and ugly I would rather do that than have something pretty.
There is much to be said about a good user interface. Something that doesn't abuse the light that is about to reach your eyes, and helps you get your work done fast. Thats all I want. Thats why I turn off all the effects on XP or Vista or whatever I use. Either they don't work right or they just don't add anything. Example: in Windows 95 the Start button was clearly a button. It was of good size easy to click, and it was clear that you should use it. In XP it blends in a little more. Becoming part of the frame that your work goes in. In Vista its just a little circle. It doesn't even read Start anymore. Just a symbol. Looks good, but it isn't clearly a button.
Now, here is a great example how a good UI can make all the difference. Ribbons. In Office 2007 the ribbon interface is brilliant. I find things easier. The pictures that are added helps my brain understand what it does. The common things are bigger, the less common smaller. I do have one problem with it. To open a new file or save or print option you have to click that big round office symbol to get a menu. How am I supposed to know that? I guess I have to read a help file or something. They were able to put everything else in a tab, why return to the drop down menu there?
Whats the point of all this? When MS considered how people work and how to help them do a better job, they cam up with Ribbons. Brilliant, helpful, home run. When they thought about how to make the program look better they came up with fuzzy title bars and tiny buttons I expect my grandma will never figure out, slow my computer, and add nothing.
So developers: help your customer do what they want to do, and then make it pretty.
Oh.. and I think I'm coming down with something.
Thursday, November 08, 2007
The Things
So I find it hard to take a day off. Why is that? Well first off I really like my job. I mean I find it relaxing, infuriatingly, challenging, and rewarding. So on my days off what should I do? Last week I went shopping. I found out I have no taste in clothes and I'm getting older and the appeal of long sleeve collared shirts is getting stronger (though sweaters are still to be avoided). The day off before that I played the Simpson's Hit and Run for half a day and hung out with Heather for the other half. But I do that every day. I am finishing too many games. I've already beaten 3 in six months. Ok so one was a one shot one night marathon with one of the kids. The weird thing is, I enjoy my job more than taking a break. Although I am enjoying watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer on Netflix. Now on the flipside I'm taking this morning off. Hahahaha. But I'll be at the youth center tonight.
Saturday, November 03, 2007
The Audacity
So, its been along time since my last update. There are a few reasons for that. One I got married, but thats not actually an update. I was married last time I wrote, so that doesn't count. I've become more busy. Not always productive, but always busy. Life is good. Its different that you always thought. You always think about the freedom, but sometimes I feel more constrained. There are always a lot of things pulling at you. Time slots fill up and time slots overlap. I feel bad sometimes for wanting me time. Youth Ministry is hard, but worthwhile. In short. I have been busy.
The second reason for few updates is because of that myspace, facebook stuff. Five or so years ago I had all these friends, from everywhere. People I had forgotten about, people I miss. I remember all those times that are so vivid, though they are normal. They were so intense because they were firsts. Remembering being on my own for the first time. Remembering growing up. The different influences on me, good and bad. Mistakes, victories, failures. Close friends. I remember my servant heart in it's youngest days. The stress, the peace, the chaos. They are good to remember, I wouldn't trade my life for them now. I've always been nostalgic. Ever since I was 7. I thought to myself I will never be as in my prime as I am now. That is still true. Its hard to express myself on all those places Facebook and Myspace and all that while keeping this up. And since no one cares about a lonely blog well, eh. Lets face it this isn't a social network. So it stretches your online time.
On the note of growing up and looking back. Its fun to look at all my friends from 5 years ago. Most of them are married. Some are dating that I would never have thought to hook up. Maybe this speaks to my ego, but its weird to see their lives continue without me being in them. I used to take up so much presence. I was entertaining, humorous, out going. Well at least how I remember me. I could totally be wrong. Its just like like I was gone and they grew up. Bam. Fast forward. Then I look back at who I was and who I have become. I've grown up too. Bam. Not overnight. It took so many influences. Good and bad to make me. Then my reaction to them, made all the difference.
Life 5 years ago was good, carefree. Now there are so many things to be done. I have to write this. This needs to be built. This person needs to be made happy. And if your wife is upset with you non of that matters. That usually happens when the load is the heaviest. I have a hard time formulating a plan, because of others. I've always been this way. I blame others for my lack of progress. Its not their fault. I have to take the burden. Bite on a bullet. Frankly I really don't care if the kids have a Christmas play. Why? Because it doesn't help anyone become a better Christian. Nay! It makes them amused. Its in my job description to do a Christmas play. What really needs to be done instead? Putting into teachers. Starting new classes. Reaching a 25 year age gap that has been ignored. Ignore a Christmas play? Heaven ashamed. Now I'm just ranting and totally of topic. Its not that the Christmas program is so bad. Its just that its so important.
I look back to 5 years ago. The me 5 years ago couldn't do what I'm doing today. I look back so fondly to those years, because of the people. My friends. They knew my secrets, and fears and joys, because we discovered them together. I left college, a warm Spirit filled place with all my friends, to come here: a vapid wasteland. I don't have any close friends here. Just Heather. I have to be explained all the inside jokes. See I'm on the outside. I know lots of people. I apparently know people I don't even remember meeting. There is no place for me at church. My closest friends are old enough to be my parents, or my kids. I even see the High Schoolers slipping away. One should be so much more, but his influence are dragging him down. He should be a light, but he's being dimmed in a fog of dust. I feel like no one cares. And anyone that cares either doesn't do anything about it or cares for meaningless things.
I don't mean to be so negative. I'm just bummed out. I need to get better at expressing my feelings. I may be having trouble with depression. I've always had an easy time getting close to people. There are just too many. Too much. Not enough. Inadequate.
So if I can leave you with summary: Life is good.
Love,
Mark
The second reason for few updates is because of that myspace, facebook stuff. Five or so years ago I had all these friends, from everywhere. People I had forgotten about, people I miss. I remember all those times that are so vivid, though they are normal. They were so intense because they were firsts. Remembering being on my own for the first time. Remembering growing up. The different influences on me, good and bad. Mistakes, victories, failures. Close friends. I remember my servant heart in it's youngest days. The stress, the peace, the chaos. They are good to remember, I wouldn't trade my life for them now. I've always been nostalgic. Ever since I was 7. I thought to myself I will never be as in my prime as I am now. That is still true. Its hard to express myself on all those places Facebook and Myspace and all that while keeping this up. And since no one cares about a lonely blog well, eh. Lets face it this isn't a social network. So it stretches your online time.
On the note of growing up and looking back. Its fun to look at all my friends from 5 years ago. Most of them are married. Some are dating that I would never have thought to hook up. Maybe this speaks to my ego, but its weird to see their lives continue without me being in them. I used to take up so much presence. I was entertaining, humorous, out going. Well at least how I remember me. I could totally be wrong. Its just like like I was gone and they grew up. Bam. Fast forward. Then I look back at who I was and who I have become. I've grown up too. Bam. Not overnight. It took so many influences. Good and bad to make me. Then my reaction to them, made all the difference.
Life 5 years ago was good, carefree. Now there are so many things to be done. I have to write this. This needs to be built. This person needs to be made happy. And if your wife is upset with you non of that matters. That usually happens when the load is the heaviest. I have a hard time formulating a plan, because of others. I've always been this way. I blame others for my lack of progress. Its not their fault. I have to take the burden. Bite on a bullet. Frankly I really don't care if the kids have a Christmas play. Why? Because it doesn't help anyone become a better Christian. Nay! It makes them amused. Its in my job description to do a Christmas play. What really needs to be done instead? Putting into teachers. Starting new classes. Reaching a 25 year age gap that has been ignored. Ignore a Christmas play? Heaven ashamed. Now I'm just ranting and totally of topic. Its not that the Christmas program is so bad. Its just that its so important.
I look back to 5 years ago. The me 5 years ago couldn't do what I'm doing today. I look back so fondly to those years, because of the people. My friends. They knew my secrets, and fears and joys, because we discovered them together. I left college, a warm Spirit filled place with all my friends, to come here: a vapid wasteland. I don't have any close friends here. Just Heather. I have to be explained all the inside jokes. See I'm on the outside. I know lots of people. I apparently know people I don't even remember meeting. There is no place for me at church. My closest friends are old enough to be my parents, or my kids. I even see the High Schoolers slipping away. One should be so much more, but his influence are dragging him down. He should be a light, but he's being dimmed in a fog of dust. I feel like no one cares. And anyone that cares either doesn't do anything about it or cares for meaningless things.
I don't mean to be so negative. I'm just bummed out. I need to get better at expressing my feelings. I may be having trouble with depression. I've always had an easy time getting close to people. There are just too many. Too much. Not enough. Inadequate.
So if I can leave you with summary: Life is good.
Love,
Mark
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
The Life
Its strange the random things that can bum you out. Things like when I don't feel productive. That one sucks the life out of you. Its like I have hours where I just can't seem to get anything done. Then its 25 minutes where you get everything done. Ugh, there is always so much to get done. On a positive note, never underestimate the value of good shoes. Our housing bill was high this month. I don't know if its surcharges or just higher. I was so bummed today I missed lunch. When I spend time with people I am at my best. It just seems like it doesn't get anything accomplished. Oh well.
Monday, June 25, 2007
The Apartment
Here is an update on my life. I moved into my apartment, Heather married me (yaaaaay), and I've started my job. All not in that order. Heather is getting used to life in the big city. Things are starting to settle down. There was all sorts of craziness getting stuff moved in and put into place. There are a few more things to do, but almost done.
Work at the church is good but slow at this point. There is no framework for youth ministry. So I am working to get that in place. That means I have to spend a lot of time getting to know leaders and figuring out what people have been doing what over the years. Also working on plans to move the nursery. I'm excited about that. Rawr! I'm ready to get to work yeah yeah yeah yeah!
Heather has no special message for this blog.
Love,
Mark
Work at the church is good but slow at this point. There is no framework for youth ministry. So I am working to get that in place. That means I have to spend a lot of time getting to know leaders and figuring out what people have been doing what over the years. Also working on plans to move the nursery. I'm excited about that. Rawr! I'm ready to get to work yeah yeah yeah yeah!
Heather has no special message for this blog.
Love,
Mark
Friday, June 08, 2007
The Day Before
So, I'm getting married tomorrow. I am so thankful for my bride to be, my new job, all the friends and family that have supported me and have been such a big help to me. And I am so thankful to God for this time of refreshment.
I thought I would be more stressed or nervous right now. But Heather has taken care of most everything. There are a few other thinks Heather and I need to finish up when we get back to Memphis but that just normal moving stuff. Personally I'm just ready for this to be over. I know Heather feels the same. I'm looking forward to not having to say good-bye for months at a time anymore.
Spending time at Grandma Bragg's I've been spoiled. Heather and G.B. set me up with quite a few things. Everyone is coming in today. Everyone else tomorrow. Heather's baby cousin Jaycee is a big headed cutie. She lets me hold her.
I feel like I'm making an awards speech.
Thanks to all the little people.
For the last time,
Bachelor Mark
I thought I would be more stressed or nervous right now. But Heather has taken care of most everything. There are a few other thinks Heather and I need to finish up when we get back to Memphis but that just normal moving stuff. Personally I'm just ready for this to be over. I know Heather feels the same. I'm looking forward to not having to say good-bye for months at a time anymore.
Spending time at Grandma Bragg's I've been spoiled. Heather and G.B. set me up with quite a few things. Everyone is coming in today. Everyone else tomorrow. Heather's baby cousin Jaycee is a big headed cutie. She lets me hold her.
I feel like I'm making an awards speech.
Thanks to all the little people.
For the last time,
Bachelor Mark
Monday, May 21, 2007
New Job
So I'm working now as Youth minister at a church in Memphis Mo. Things are going well. I've not started a job like this before so the ramp up is different, but I'll figure it out soon enough. Just getting a feel for protocol.
Love All
Love All
Saturday, March 24, 2007
Thursday, March 08, 2007
The Second Interview
So this last weekend I had another interview. It went well, but now I'm sick. I'm working on a webpage and seeing what I can do about my laptop. Love all.
Monday, February 26, 2007
The Life
Someone is trying to make money off of a tomb, and I'm not sure if its Cameron or Christians.
I had a job interview today. Now I am tired.
My laptop is still toast. Don't buy Acer.
I'm kinda bummed.
Love,
Mark
I had a job interview today. Now I am tired.
My laptop is still toast. Don't buy Acer.
I'm kinda bummed.
Love,
Mark
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
The Crack
So about a month ago I sent in my computer for 2 weeks to fix the Ethernet and wifi. It comes back ethy works but the wifi is still out. Now this vertical line of discolouration appears 3 inches in and 1 inch wide. Then a little while later the screen all out cracks on me. So now I get the run around on how my screen isn't under warranty. I kindly explain that the repair work was under warranty. $600 to fix it. I call back. $400 to fix it. Needless to say they are getting another call back.
Going to learn the joys of Vista tomorrow.
Going to learn the joys of Vista tomorrow.
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
The Lesson
So I came up with a new idea for teaching rubber-meets-the-road type lessons. Then I got the idea that I should take topics from the news. Especially topics that students would know better and find the Biblical truth in it. For example Brittany Spears shaved her head. The lesson could be about compromising a little bit until its all compromised.
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
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